It’s the first Thursday in September. Love is in the air and to prove that, we have Trinity Rodman showing up at the US Open in a crop top supporting her tennis player boyfriend Ben Shelton.
I’m not going to allow this week’s True Romance to get off on the wrong foot. Keep the thoughts about wearing an article of clothing that reads “I heart my boyfriend” on it as a crazy girlfriend move to yourselves.
I don’t want to hear it. She doesn’t have to do that in order for all the influencers who have descended upon the tournament to know that he’s taken. They already know that. This is about love.
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We still believe in that around here. Cougars have made a strong case for a long time now that they also believe that love has not died, and we’re going to learn from a jaguar who is taking it another step further.
Plus, we have good news about a certain tent at a certain festival making its triumphant return from disaster. And the cherry on top, if you will, this week is the realization that you’re not as weird as you thought.
But before we get into all that, I had someone reach out with a question about cheating. It involves Sleep Number beds. The question is, has anyone ever gotten busted having an affair because of the Sleep Number app?
I think it’s likely that someone has. If you, or someone you know, had the restful sleep, heart rate, or number of times getting out of bed in the middle of the night data, betray you, and reveal an affair. I want to hear about it.
Go follow True Romance on Twitter and Facebook and keep sending your emails here: sean.joseph@outkick.com (anonymously if you prefer).
Rozz Switzer, a former Australian TV presenter, actress, media entrepreneur, and sometimes referred to in her home country as the “Queen of Infomercials,” is now a happy jaguar.
She’s at the top of the romantic food chain when it comes to older single women enjoying the company of young men.
“I’m embracing what I call the Jaguar effect. The pumas are the girls in their 30s, the cougars are in their 40s but the 50s onward is the jaguars. As you know, jaguars are the pinnacle of the cat world, the apex predator!’ she told the Daily Mail recently.
Fascinating, am I right? Is all this cat talk how so many end up with a house full of cats? I’m no scientist, so I can’t answer that.
I know you’re on the edge of your seat, as am I, prepared for more feline love talk. Let’s do that and leave the science to someone else to figure out.
“Nothing is above them in the food chain. They are solitary by nature… they don’t need anyone. Single and thriving. Rather than chasing, I let things come to me and I choose,” Switzer continued.
“Think of the car, they didn’t call it a cougar, they called it a Jaguar because it is sleek and sophisticated.”
That’s right, they do call it a Jaguar and not a cougar. And it is sleek and sophisticated. Cats and cars are what you want in a love life with no strings attached.
“I got all the way to my 50s and now I am enjoying them! I am now so busy and I don’t need a man in my life to give me the things I already have,” she explained.
“If I like the company I will have the company. It’s the Jaguar effect, I get to pick and choose. It doesn’t have to have any connection at all, it is all for fun and pleasure!”
Well there you have it. A form of romance that on paper looks like it could be lonely and have a slight scent of cat food. That couldn’t be further from how it works when practiced in the real world.
In reality, it’s sleek and sophisticated, and you’re the apex predator in a cat world. It’s about fun and being drama free. I know that would appear to the untrained eye as if there are unresolved issues with relationships. That’s silly.
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There’s good news on the Orgy Dome front. Burning Man will take place with its special tents fully erected. Last year’s pounding took it out.
But the folks responsible for making the magic happen every year asked for help and the people came through for the Orgy Dome.
The NY Post is reporting that the “hedonist hideaway” is “back up and running.” They received the donations necessary to erect it.
They’re stocked up on protection, and it’s a go on getting the dome rocking during this year’s festival. Sure there’s lost time to make up for, but not without throwing safety out the window.
“We want an atmosphere where people are playing, and not walking around staring at people, or looking at people to pick up on. A lot of our guests, they don’t want to be picked up on by singles,” an organizer said of the dome.
I had originally planned to go with another story in this slot, but when this popped up this morning, I took it as a sign. I always go where the romance takes me, and today it took me to the Orgy Dome at Burning Man.
I may still, in the future, use the other story. So I’m not going to spoil it here. The return of the Orgy Dome has far too much romance in it to ignore.
On top of that, it was a slice of good news that I felt went well with the realization that you’re not quite as weird as you thought you were.
You could be under the impression that your romantic preference is weird. Okay, it could be a little weird, but not as weird as you think it is.
There are a few mentioned here by the freaks on Reddit that I would never have guessed would be romantic preferences and even if there are others into them, they’re still pretty damn weird.
I mean necks, veins, and hands? What is going on with that? If any of those are your romantic preferences, I need to know more about them. Here’s the proof that you’re not that weird:
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That’s all I have this week. Keep the song of the week suggestions coming. I had a few to choose from this week. If I didn’t get to yours, I’m keeping a list and will work them in.
Thanks for reading the column each week. Remember, if you were caught cheating by the Sleep Number app, I want to hear from you. Also, I need romantic preference explanations for necks, veins, and hands.
You can reach me, anonymously if you prefer, at sean.joseph@outkick.com. And go follow along on Twitter and Facebook.
